Ok so I've been training at the gym since I was 16 and in that time I've noticed some certain things that are common whatever gym you're in. And quite frankly these are things that we'd all be better off without. Anyone who's ever been to a gym knows it's true and more than likely agrees.
The Meatheads
We all know them we can't escape them; the guys that look like they feed themselves anabolic steroids three meals a day and proceed to walk around the gym acting superior to anyone who doesn't measure up in sheer girth. Some of them them are so ridiculously massive that it is almost as though they've become morbidly obese with muscle mass.
The Wannabe-Meatheads
Like the above in attitude of superiority but have actually got nothing to boast about. Usually found in large numbers talking loudly boasting about the events of the previous evening. They tend also to be the size of an anorexic twig making out that the abysmally feeble weights they're lifting are actually the equivalent of large cars.
The Over-Eager Personal Trainers
No I don't want a personal trainer. No I don't care how reasonable your rates are. No I don't care if there is a free fitness assessment. Yes I'm quite sure I know what I'm doing - I've been doing it for long enough. SOD OFF AND LEAVE ME ALONE!
The Talkers
Look I just want to go in and train. I don't go in there for a conversation so please don't talk to me.
The Machine-Hoggers
Similar to meatheads but will get on a machine and take root. How many different types of bench press are there, and do you really need to do them all?
The Time Wasters
Look if your telephone conversation is really that important, should you really be in the gym taking it? And do you have to sit on the machine that people are queuing up to use whilst you take the call?
The Ill-Equipped
Surely you don't think jeans, work shoes and shirt are an effective training attire? A coat as well? Oh well that's just lovely.
The Sweat Machines
Two variations to this one; first up the ones with such a horrendous stench that it's like they're mounting a personal war of attrition against deodorant - and why is it they always insist in choosing the machine next to you? Secondly the ones that sweat buckets and refuse to wipe up after themselves. Gross.
And finally...
The f'ing, deafeningly loud, terrible, techno, rave music. If I wanted to listen to f'ing, deafeningly loud, terrible, techno, rave music I'd go to a f'ing, deafeningly loud, terrible, techno rave! Why the hell do you also need to play it so god damned loud that it drowns out everyone else's mp3 players? We take them so that we can listen so what we want, not the f'ing, deafeningly loud, terrible, techno, rave music! So don't turn that shit up!
Eh....why does this remind me of my post 'Types of people that should be banned on the MRT'?? ;-)
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